26: All I Need is Love - CeeLo Green and The Muppets

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hello and welcome to we can't rewind we've gone too far a podcast where a scotsman an irish man

and a bulgarian discuss the worst silliest weirdesses fuck music videos i am neil hi i'm

Hi, I'm Dave.

Merry whatever holiday you celebrate, you lovely human beans.

Beans? Human beans?

Yes. Yes.

You lovely human beans.

Now I'm self-conscious about saying beans, as in beans, as in Heinz.

That's the episode is brought to you by Heinz Beans.

You do know that other brands make beans as well.

Other brands are available.

We have come from the land of tacky Christmas theme songs to introduce you to this year's colonish stocking.

All I Need Is Love by CeeLo Green.

featuring The Muppets.

This song exists.

Somehow.

Celo, what are you doing here?

I was just about to ask you the same thing.

Well, I'm here for Christmas with all the guys.

What's going on?

I was on my way to a Christmas party in Atlanta

and I got lost.

Oh, gee, hotlanto?

Yeah.

In a convertible rose?

Oh, you're never going to make it in this weather.

Well, why don't you come in and join our party?

You sure?

Absolutely.

We'd love to have you.

CeeLo Green's car breaks down on his way to a Christmas party.

This happens in front of a house full of Muppets partying, so naturally he joins in.

As any same person would.

Now, I fucking love the Muppets, especially in the context of Christmas, because a Muppets

Christmas Carol is a masterpiece and I will fight anyone who disagrees with me.

This video unfortunately doesn't quite live up to that gleaming gem of a cinematic experience.

There's also a Muppet version of CeeLo Green, which is weird because CeeLo himself is already

a pure Muppet.

Released in November 2012 and currently holds 6.7 out of 10 on IMDB.

This is not a joke.

This video is directed by Mark Klasfeld, a person who in all fairness has done a lot of music videos in his life.

Like, a lot.

And some proper bangers too.

Foo Fighters, Sub 41, Britney Spears, Neely.

Also a fair amount of videos that we are bound to someday watch for this podcast.

So are we all excited for Christmas?

the zoom lag made that sound like we were very not excited

that was us actually being quiet depending on what lord on omnicrom does

i'm excited to have time off work for a bit how about you yeah enjoy christmas we do the same

thing every year we just go around to my family's and drink lots basically but uh yeah so it's always

good though. This is my

first Christmas song this year.

I usually wait until the first, you know,

traditionally. I think I love Christmas

Day. I can't stand the run

up to Christmas because it's just so

long. It's like, start feeling

the Christmas cheer on Christmas Eve

and then it's better. It's my thing.

We say while recording a podcast, Christmas podcast

in November. We're part of the problem, guys.

It's December.

No, it's Christmas Eve. Oh, I can see

old Saint Nick from here. He's

crashed into the high-rise.

Neo looked

very very sad for a second there

when he realised this is the first

Christmas song he's listened to this year

this is how his season is going to be like

buddy sorry

not even a wham

could have been fairytale in New York

instead we listened to this

so we did this for you listeners

what are your initial thoughts

about this

video? I think I'm significantly

less harsh on it than you

by the judging by these notes.

So why don't you unleash your hate for a moment?

It's just a really fucking dumb video.

There's not much hate to it.

I just, it's a shite video.

It's just offensively bad.

Like, it's not, it's not funny.

There's nothing to it.

It's just a bad video.

But someone paid money for it.

I think we do, we do have a note at the start,

which I think we're just going to say and move on.

So we don't bring it all down.

But apparently he's a piece of shit.

So you'll agree.

He is.

yeah yeah it sounds like he's uh not a very nice person back to happy muppet film yeah

yeah let's start with the most obvious one why is he dressed like a literal trash bag that he is

yeah it's quite the look he comes in and sort of looks like what material would you call that

pvc like the one that they make like the king clothes portrayed he's like in a big big red suit

kind of made of that because it's red it has a christmasy flair to it i guess if you say if you

say so yeah i think it's a sort of uh sort of outfit only he could pull off and i don't know

what i mean by that but it just sort of you know it just sort of suits him very well does it well i

mean no i mean it's it's horrid right i mean if you look at it just he's either really sweaty or

really cold but he did drive with his roof down in the middle of winter in a snowstorm that is true

plus oh actually i'm just i forgot there's actually there's a red overcoat that he wears

throughout the video.

Jesus, that looks uncomfortable.

Looks like a Christmas turkey

wrapped in plastic.

You don't want to get that

too near to the fire

or it'll start melting.

It'll be like napalm.

That doesn't make the video

so much better though.

Pulls up in a Rolls Royce

without a roof.

What's the word I'm looking for?

Convertible Rolls Royce.

And that is mentioned

by the Muppets.

Initially I was like,

oh, that's kind of funny

because he's driving in a snowstorm

in a convertible.

I don't know.

I find it kind of strange

that they're specifically

naming the brand of the car it kind of feels like product placement in a kid's video i don't think

it is but it feels weird to me is it is it product placement or is it uh status confirmation like oh

a driver's convertible rolls royce maybe maybe he insisted that he turned up in a rolls royce

i don't know it's it's a fucking tacky video yeah from that point on it's basically just the

Muppets doing Muppety things.

They're throwing fish at each other,

pulling chickens out of boxes,

and they're just fucking around

in sort of Muppety fashion.

I had that kind of effect

where when there's music hand visuals,

the music can lie to you about the visuals.

Because I think because it's like

a happy, cheery song,

I was kind of like,

oh yeah, this is pretty good.

And then it was only once I kind of

stopped and thought about it,

I'm like, nothing,

nothing has happened.

Wait, has Cedar Green been in any films?

I hope not.

Probably not.

Let's have a quick look.

He might have been in something like, this is the end or something, where acting does not matter.

No, he's been on TV shows.

Did he play himself, though?

I think it was the voice he was on.

That's why he's been driving in the chair, sort of a play on that.

Ah, okay.

Play on that thing.

It's funny, though, I don't feel like Ceele Green has any charisma.

He just blends in with the Muppets.

I don't mean that in the bad way, but he just, I don't know, he's just a bit dull.

Oh, it's a bit sad that the best actor in this is literal puppets,

like felt puppets that have people's hands up their asses.

Well, well, well, the Muppets are good actors.

This is something I wanted to mention.

Apparently, well, I have seen this in real life, not in the Muppets,

but with a different puppeteer, whenever you're like filming the Muppets,

they all stay in character in between takes.

So you'll be like sitting there giving an actual Muppet directions

and they'll be talking about it and going and that's not nice i presume it's something to do

with like voice like just for them to not break voices because i presume it's quite difficult to

keep on especially fucking kermit voice imagine that that would hurt your hurt your voice after a

while because i did one video for a a retail chain in the uk which will remain unnamed that it was

basically like an internal video starring a muppet style puppet and the puppeteer was this american

guy and he was fucking fantastic and he would literally keep the puppet in character the entire

time so i kept on finding myself just like looking this puppet in the eye and talking to it i was like

you're not real

I'm drinking Irish coffee

to get into the Christmas spirit

and it's working

thank you coffee and alcohol

no judges here dear

absolutely not

it's five o'clock somewhere

I've never had an Irish coffee.

No joke.

You should have one.

They're good.

Surely you did just by extension of having coffee in Ireland.

Well, technically yes, I guess.

Great combination whiskey and caffeine.

It's a, it's a, it's what you need when you're doing a Christmas podcast.

I need to ask what whiskey you're using.

Uh, Jura.

Oh, yeah.

Classic.

It's considered bad manners to use good whiskey for like mixing stuff, but I didn't have any

other whiskey.

So.

Fuck 'em.

Like just the standard 10 year old single malt.

I can't remember.

I don't think it's in

particularly fancy

it's fair

should we try to talk

about this video

it's a really bad video

there's nothing to talk

about it but

should we try

yeah try for a bit

then we'll talk about

other Muppets stuff

which is actually good

I think to be honest

the best part of this

video was the

were the Muppets

and I'm

I'm quite a

I'm quite new

when it comes to

actually appreciating

Muppets

I

the old me would have

been like I

I have no interest

in these

these suck things

whatever you want to

call them

but they

the video a little bit grounded

and make it a bit of fun.

I felt like they could have probably played a bit more

on the Muppets Christmas

Muppets Christmas Carol.

Yeah.

They could have played with that a bit, I think.

But it just feels, I don't know, it just feels a bit dull.

Yeah, I think it's legitimately

in my opinion, one of the best

Christmas films ever made.

It's not even just because it's Muppets, it's just a good film.

The first time I watched

Muppets Christmas Carol was Last Christmas.

Oh, nice. How did you find it?

It was good.

Basically, Scott was very irrationally angry

that they've never seen that.

No, it was 100% rational.

100% rational.

Or Treasure Island.

So we watched him back to back on Christmas Day.

You know, I remember not liking Muppets Treasure Island as much,

but that was probably just because it was...

Tim Curry, how dare you?

Well, apart from Tim Curry, who's, you know, amazing and everything.

I feel like Treasure Island has a bit more adult jokes.

Like something like wink, wink, nudge, nudge towards the parents in the audience.

of tim curry's in it then probably pretty much i think the the the new muppets i've not seen the

second one but the the muppets movie the one that came out like five or six years ago is i remember

i watched that on my birthday one year and i just remember laughing my ass off to a ridiculous degree

the entire time and that's that's got some good songs in it the more i think about it the more i'm

like i'm annoyed at this it really depends whether this song is how much of it is um the muppets or

like the jim hansen corporation foundation how much is their involvement and how much is

ceilogreen's involvement maybe it's like a sort of made by committee sort of situation this this

one because i know that the muppets movie the new ones it was written by brett mckenzie from

flight the concords and that's what that's why is the music so good in that so maybe this was just a

a bit of a made by committee sort of i've now imagined a committee of muppets arguing about

one of the questions I was going to ask

both of you is which is the best

song to feature the Muppets

in terms of Christmas songs I think

it feels like Christmas which is

I think it's at the start of the Muppets Christmas Carol

and Thankful Heart which is towards the end

where Michael Caine has

realised the error of his ways at Scrooge

and you get the delight of

Michael Caine's terrible singing

life is like a journey

who knows when it ends

Yes, and if you need to know

The measure of a man

You simply count his friends

Stop and look around

Which I highly recommend.

They're both really good Christmas songs

and I just mentioned it as well.

There's A Muppet of a Man

which is in one of the new movies

proper power ballad.

Jason Segel, he just

gives it 110% in terms of power-balled cheese.

- I don't know.

- I'm a man, I'm a man.

- I'm a man, I'm a very man.

- Yeah, I'm going to suggest we just keep fishing.

- The next number, Kermit.

- Terrific, Fanny, that's great.

Oh, hey, Brian, River, Scott.

Are you guys ready?

- We're up next.

- Well, actually we have a big problem.

- Wait a second, where's Pat?

- We can't find him.

- What?

- Well, don't worry guys.

We know what to do in situations like this.

- What's that?

- Pat!

- Get me, get me, get me, get me.

- Relax, relax.

Everything is taken care of again.

- It is?

- I was gonna say, did either of you

knew this song existed before we looked into it?

- Nope, nope.

- That's not a good sign, is it?

- Nope, I had no idea this had happened.

I'm trying to think, well it was 2012, I'm trying to rewind my mind back to 2012.

What Muppets films were out?

I think, so the Muppets film was in the newer one, came out in 2011.

Because I was thinking maybe this was like a Muppets dark period where there weren't any good films out.

And they just thought, so the Muppets film was out in 2011 and they went with this.

So you hear the real Muppets are?

Yeah, because Waller, who I think they made for the Muppets film,

because he's kind of like a generic main character Muppet, he's in this video.

So yeah, so it was after the Muppets film.

So maybe this was just cashing in on the fact the Muppets film was successful.

Was Craig Robinson in the Muppets movie?

No, I don't see him.

I did enjoy Craig Robinson's cameo as Santa.

That was probably one of the few parts that I did enjoy.

Because he can actually act.

There's not much acting needed from him because I genuinely think that his reaction to this

accidentally racist sentence.

Yeah.

Okay, so for people who have not seen the video, which is every single one of you, don't lie.

There is a moment when Santa shows up in front of the Muppet Walter.

Walter, was that his name, Walter?

And Santa turns out to be Craig Robinson, a really funny Black American actor, him being Black Matters.

He has a monologue of saying how Christmas is real because something, something, if Christmas is in your heart, Christmas is in your home or something like this.

To which this actual Muppet Walter turns around and says,

Oh, sweet, Santa is my homie.

Which, Walter is a very white-looking Muppet,

and that was very awkward to listen to.

Craig kind of takes a breath and, like, looks straight down the camera

in a sort of disappointed fashion,

which I did find quite funny,

which is a bit weird for a Muppet's thing.

But it was funny as fuck.

You think one person would clean up their chimney?

I knew it, I knew it.

You're real.

Of course I'm real, Walter.

You got Santa in your heart.

You got Santa in your home.

So, so Santa's my homie.

Yeah.

I'm your homie.

my final point is i don't really have a final point but all i need to say is

isante your homie i hope so nelly i hope so oh god i won't take a shower after this so this this

was a new song for me and i'm not a huge fan of cilo green or the muppets but i'm solely starting

warming to like the Muppets

but this is the first Christmas song I heard this year

and now it's likely to be stuck

in my head and that's a bad thing

I picked this video and

I've had this slow realisation

throughout this podcast that I've made a terrible mistake

because nothing happened

I was lured in

just by the fact that I love the Muppets

and the Muppets can do no wrong, this must be fine

but I think this is one case where the Muppets

have phoned it in

try harder next time Muppets

this was when the Muppets

they were down on their luck

they'd all

developed drug problems

and Sheila Green came around and they thought

let's make a video and they didn't know what they were doing

it's not their fault guys, it's not their fault

poignments

this Irish coffee's really kicking in

favourite part is

3 minutes 15 seconds in

I need to underline this video

is fucking 7 minutes long

so halfway point, 3 minutes 15 seconds in

Santa's Craig Robinson looks straight at the camera after Walter the Muppet tells him,

so Santa's my homie.

And this is the only redeemable moment of the whole video.

And I laughed a lot.

And the worst part is everything before and after the Santa being your homie remark.

I mean, come on, it's a really fucking tough video.

Favourite part?

I guess the funny Muppet banter got me in the Christmas mood, I guess.

But I did appreciate the credits at the end.

And I think that's, we've said this before, it's quite an understated thing.

And I think most, if not all, music videos should at least have some form of accreditation to say who was involved in the making.

I find it quite interesting, personally.

So there wasn't actually a lot with this one, to my surprise.

It felt like there wasn't a lot of money thrown at it.

This is me.

Worst part, for me, the worst part was the song itself.

I think it's best enjoyed muted.

So my favourite part, the rapping prawn Muppet.

Pepe the prawn.

I enjoyed that just purely because he's dressed like a Russian gangster rapper.

And he sounds like the guy from Little Big.

And I just find that funny.

And the worst part, yeah, just general disappointment in the Muppets.

Just basically CeeLo Green destroyed my childhood.

Add this to the little controversies on Wikipedia.

I'm going to add that to Wikipedia.

In 2021, CeeLo Green destroyed David Mikichi's childhood.

So is that an iron out no?

No.

No.

Yeah, it's a hard no from me.

But go and watch the three minutes, 15 seconds in,

just to look at Craig Robinson's disappointed face

of what he's done in his life.

He does generally have a bit of a look of a kind of like,

what am I doing here?

He's like, oh, fuck, I've made a mistake.

To me, it's like, oh, I'm glad I got paid up front for this.

Yeah, the look on his face is kind of like the visual representation

of how I felt as I realised I made a mistake picking this video.

Just like, ah.

I think the Muppets hit a new low.

Yeah, and his first name is C.

Oh!

Take a look at the show notes for links to today's video.

Yeah.

But why would you want to say?

If you really want to, links to Instagram, etc.

Also email, go into farcast.gmail.com.

we'd love to hear your thoughts and any good recommendations

for Christmas videos. Save us from ourselves

next year. If you're enjoying the podcast

leave us a review on Apple Podcasts, Spotify

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Bye! Bye!

Goodbye!

Happy Christmas!

If you haven't already, stay good.

Jesus, what an episode.

Oh, God.

Yeah, my bad.

We literally had to push it out of our asses.

Yeah, I'm good.