Explicit 10: Baba - Kelly Key
Ep. 10

10: Baba - Kelly Key

Episode description

A Scotsman, an Irishman and a Bulgarian talk about Brazilian culture and excessive drooling with special guest Ana!

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0:00

Buh-

0:30

Oh, sorry.

0:32

No, it's fine.

0:33

Tell me when I'm supposed to speak.

0:35

Today we seriously start questioning the sanity of early

0:39

noughties pop producers who thought sexualising 17-year-old girls

0:42

is a genius idea that will absolutely not backfire.

0:45

We take a deep safeguarding dive into the world of Kelly Kay's baba,

0:49

which means drool in English and not baby,

0:51

which makes this episode 100% more yucky somehow.

0:54

We've also brought an expert in all things Brazilian.

0:56

Say hello to our first podcast guest ever, Ana!

1:00

Hello!

1:01

Welcome, Anna. Hello.

1:03

I suppose I'm a specialist because I'm Brazilian, so it just comes with me.

1:21

The video was released in 2001 and was the first hit of the Portuguese-Brazilian pop star Kelly Kay.

1:27

It quickly became the biggest hit in Brazil in 2001 to 2002.

1:31

Directed by John Els Jr.

1:33

A person we could not find much about,

1:34

except he was somewhat known in Brazil for directing kid-centered films.

1:38

It would be ignorant to try and discredit his work and artistry,

1:41

but based on the things that we saw,

1:43

the success of Baba was not relying at all on the music video itself.

1:47

What I'm trying to say is his work is shit.

1:50

The history of the song itself is what we call in the biz...

1:55

It really is.

1:56

It's what we call in the biz problematic as fuck. The song was inspired by the failing marriage of Kelly Kay to the Brazilian singer Latino. It was a fuck you song and in her words he was treating her like a child and was also an abominable asshole who cheated on her. The song was her way of telling him she's grown up and won't let him treat her that way. Sounds fantastic and empowering, right? When they divorced she was 19 or 20, he was 10 years her senior, they were together for about 6 years and had a child together.

2:25

The video itself is, for lack of better words, pretty fucking bad.

2:29

Just ignoring any potential safeguarding issues, the camera work is abysmal, the dancing is

2:34

cringeworthy and the acting is non-existent.

2:37

In short, it is a typical 2001 pop music video.

2:41

It starts immediately with a high school teacher, played by the Brazilian soap opera star Marcelo

2:47

Novaez, trying to teach his lesson but the sight of knees and sternum are just too much for him to

2:52

take because he keeps gawking at his female student, Kelly Kaye.

2:55

Someone please give this guy an edition of Nuts Magazine, please.

2:59

Can I just give her...

3:01

Her name is Kelly Key.

3:03

Key as in key in English because that's her stage name because a guy told her he's going

3:08

to be the key to her success.

3:10

Wow.

3:11

Oh, wow.

3:14

I just thought I should let you know.

3:16

We apologize to Kelly Kaye.

3:18

We are dumb, dumb, dumb.

3:19

We should have checked out before we started this podcast.

3:22

I think I said it correct.

3:24

So joke's on you.

3:26

Robert, you knew.

3:27

Dave, do you remember what you said?

3:29

No, I'll just leave this explanation in and then that covers us because we're professionals.

3:35

There are occasional scenes of Kaylee and some male background dancers dancing in a school

3:40

hallway.

3:40

And it's also an incredibly awkward striptease dance routine marked as a dream sequence, I

3:45

guess.

3:46

And then the literal money shot at teacher spying his student and taking photos of her

3:50

at night.

3:51

And the video has so many problems and can someone please, please page Freud on this one because I'm at my wit's end.

3:58

Hi Anna, how are you?

4:00

Hi, I'm good. How are you?

4:02

Are you having a good apocalypse?

4:04

I am enjoying my apocalypse indeed, yes. I feel like the dystopic future has arrived.

4:10

Was part of your bucket list to make three people suffer by watching this video? Because you succeeded. Well done.

4:16

You know what they say, misery loves company.

4:20

I was saying to Anna beforehand, if you don't think about the lyrics or the video, it is actually catchy as fuck.

4:26

Is it though? It's pretty bad.

4:28

I think so. I was kind of having to stop myself dancing along to it.

4:32

I think the melody of it is really catchy, it's really sticky.

4:35

And I think it's one of the reasons why it was such a big hit.

4:38

Because it does stick to you.

4:40

Since I started showing this video clip to you guys, I was just being stuck to my head.

4:45

Just can't get out of it.

4:47

So what age range was it popular with at the time?

4:50

Like what was the core audience of Kelly Key?

4:54

Like early teens, I would say, like really quite young people.

4:58

Like I would say maybe between 13 to 16, I would say it was quite her core audience.

5:05

And I was a part of it.

5:07

I was not such a big fan of her when I was growing up,

5:10

but I was certainly exposed to the full blown sensation that was Kelly Key

5:16

when she just exploded in the media.

5:18

And it was massive.

5:19

I don't believe there is a single Brazilian soul that was born,

5:23

that was like sentient at that moment in time

5:25

that doesn't know Baba as a song.

5:28

And it's massive.

5:29

So why? Do you have any explanation for this?

5:32

Because it's for all intents and purposes,

5:34

it's a pretty cookie cut pop song.

5:36

Like for the time, it resonated really well.

5:40

She was also drawing a lot of inspirations from,

5:43

especially like Britney Spears.

5:45

If you think about some of her video clips of like her as a school girl,

5:49

around early 2000s and like oops i did it again and all of those things that the aesthetic is quite

5:56

similar and this kind of idea of like a young girl uh exploring her her sexual needs in in a weird

6:03

way like that as you know like making sure that the the world understood that the young girls were

6:08

sexual beings in a way that you had that awareness it was kind of a big thing at the time um if you

6:15

think maybe about even like uh spice girls and uh think about the success of the song when two become

6:21

one uh and how a lot of little girls wouldn't know what they were singing and then nowadays you look

6:26

back i was like oh wow um that kind of mentality for it but she had a lot of support from a lot of

6:34

people like her ex-boyfriend latino he's massive in brazil and the the guy who is in the video clip

6:40

as well Marcelo Mavaes uh he he's like from Globo which is the main tv station in Brazil the main

6:48

opinion forming tool in Brazil so him being there was a big thing like wasn't it like a single person

6:54

just kind of raising a bit of eyebrows and being like yeah it's not should we look into those that

6:58

guy he sounds a bit dingy uh they wasn't really raising eyebrows to her success per se there was

7:04

certain other things that later down in her career that influenced how people viewed her but

7:10

At the time, it's weird to explain.

7:14

Brazil is a very weird place, especially when it comes to sexuality

7:18

and when it comes to how that's portrayed, especially on TV and on the media.

7:23

Now, you have to think that this time, what was showing at 4 o'clock in the afternoon

7:28

or maybe earlier than that was something called the banheiro do Gugu,

7:32

which is Gugu's bathtub in which they used to throw soaps into a hot tub

7:38

and then put a man and a woman.

7:40

The woman in a very small bikini and a thong and the guy in speedos.

7:48

And they had to try and stop each other from removing soaps from the tub.

7:53

So this is basically like Teletubbies.

7:57

Brazilian Teletubbies.

7:58

If you see about all the music, how it is, and we have a lot of highly sexualized music.

8:04

But because I grew up in that environment, it was really not something that would raise that many eyebrows.

8:10

I don't know. Maybe I was quite sheltered as well because I was quite young and I didn't quite see it that way.

8:16

But I don't remember it being that problematic.

8:19

It was more of a like, oh, have you seen they're like fighting Kelly Key and Latino, these two big names.

8:24

Oh, what's going on? Not so much. Oh, my God, she's underage. He's an asshole. What's going on?

8:29

I think when I was younger, I never really thought about kind of the possibly darker side of showbiz.

8:33

Maybe it's only kind of looking at it with adult eyes.

8:35

You're a bit like, oh, that's a bit dodgy.

8:37

Yeah, I think it's really a product of its time.

8:40

But that mixed, so it's like Brazilian deep-seated culture

8:44

mixed with international influences of what was Britney Spears

8:49

and like Madonna a lot for her at the time.

8:51

There was that kind of like sexually charged persona

8:55

and of like taking, almost like taking ownership of that,

8:59

which at the time was very much the vibe of like pop music.

9:03

So yeah, it's just very interesting.

9:04

I don't have any issue with her being 17 or 18 and singing about like,

9:09

look at me and draw over me or whatever.

9:11

It's not my favorite type of music, but that's not my problem.

9:15

The problem is that her husband married her when she was 14 or like 13 and he was 24.

9:20

And in any way, shape or form, you look at it, there was a very big power difference

9:26

and also child grooming.

9:28

And I just kind of like, I was looking at her stuff nowadays.

9:31

Obviously, again, I can't understand what she's saying.

9:34

But she seems that she's at peace with everything.

9:38

At least it seems that way.

9:40

But I just kind of keep on feeling like, I just feel, is no one questioning this guy?

9:44

Because I honestly can't see a situation where someone will be in mid-20s and will go chase

9:51

over people who just turned like teens, if you get what I mean.

9:54

Yeah, I see where you're coming from.

9:56

But I mean, from the things that I found as like trying to look up a bit more about not just how I saw this whole thing, but how the rest of Brazil perceived this slap on Latino's face.

10:08

But I really couldn't find that much about it.

10:11

What I did find was that, like, later in 2011, she became an ambassador for a charity, a Brazilian charity, against pedophilia.

10:23

And that helped people to, like, recognize the differences between, you know, like, actually caring for someone and being abusive towards someone and helping people to make those choices and to denounce people that might be acting in a bad way towards it.

10:37

And like she used her image as someone who has been through that.

10:41

But like I've never seen anything of like her getting back at Latino for that.

10:46

But I know that she has used what has happened to her in the past as a spokesperson to help other people.

10:53

But never I've seen something between the two of them like nowadays or rehashing it.

10:58

Just him being really creepy and saying that like she was the love of his life like not that long ago.

11:06

that he has never been able to love anyone like her.

11:09

But I have not found any pronunciations

11:11

from Kelly Key herself regarding that.

11:29

If that's covered the CD backstory.

11:31

Yes.

11:31

I think it does a bit.

11:33

Yeah, so the video.

11:35

It's a video.

11:36

exists.

11:37

It exists.

11:38

It does remind me

11:39

quite a lot of

11:40

was it

11:40

Hit Me Baby

11:41

One More Time

11:41

the one where

11:42

Britney Spears was

11:43

schoolgirl and shit.

11:44

It does kind of

11:44

look like a sort of

11:45

Brazilian interpretation

11:46

of that I guess.

11:47

Yeah I think

11:47

very much that

11:49

that's like

11:50

totally the aesthetic

11:51

that they were going for

11:52

was the Hit Me Baby

11:53

One More Time

11:54

kind of look

11:55

and like

11:55

schoolgirl being sassy

11:57

and like

11:57

caressing a pen

11:59

kind of thing.

12:00

Harassing a pen.

12:02

She caressed

12:03

a lot of pens

12:03

in that.

12:04

She did.

12:05

So she caresses the desk, she caresses her thighs, she caresses the pen, and then she bites the pen.

12:12

Very sexy.

12:14

All our pens must be chewed up the fuck.

12:15

What class is that?

12:17

What are they being taught?

12:18

All they seem to be doing is chewing their pens.

12:20

And I don't know, I'd quite like to see that teacher's identification.

12:23

I just want to make sure he's actually a teacher.

12:27

Anna, can you please explain to us and our audience, how do Brazilian schoolrooms look like?

12:34

Because like this video, it looks like the bathroom.

12:37

I'm actually really the worst possible person to do that because I went to a weird school.

12:43

I didn't go to traditional teaching.

12:45

I went to a Montessori school where we all seated in groups.

12:49

But from my understanding, that's the look of a schoolroom.

12:54

Oh, really?

12:55

There goes my theory.

12:56

Quite sterile, like really like a bit more like white rooms, like blank walls.

13:00

you might have a bit higher up windows.

13:03

And at the time, it would have been fans on the walls and clocks, that kind of thing.

13:08

But yeah, I did not go to traditional schooling.

13:12

Maybe part of my weirdness is to be blamed for that.

13:17

Maybe part of my lack of understanding of Kelly Key's video clip.

13:21

But I do remember impersonating her in school and doing the whole removing,

13:26

like letting my hair fall down the shoulders and making faces.

13:29

I do remember doing that.

13:31

My theory was that they just didn't have any space.

13:34

So they just shot the whole thing in the, basically, the toilets.

13:39

Because all the other classrooms were full of students trying to, you know, do classes and shit.

13:45

But apparently not the case.

13:47

The shots where they're just filming that she's dancing for him,

13:51

they're all just doing it all in the same room and then filming through the window.

13:55

But they're both in the same room.

13:57

There's no two different rooms.

13:58

there was not a lot of budget.

14:00

I think all the budget they had,

14:02

they went to get the actor guy,

14:05

Marcelo Nevis.

14:06

They got their money swore.

14:08

Creepy.

14:09

Oh, thank you.

14:10

Oh, he is like,

14:11

he's like one of like the good guys.

14:13

I don't know how,

14:13

how do they say like in films in here,

14:15

you have like a profile casting

14:17

and they're always like the good guys,

14:18

the heroes.

14:19

Yeah, like proper hero kind of thing.

14:21

So in the soap operas,

14:22

he was always like the good guy.

14:23

Always gets the girl.

14:24

Bear in mind a lot of the time,

14:26

actors just,

14:27

they get jobs off their agents

14:28

they don't really know what they're in for i don't think we could really hold it against them too much

14:32

he just can't have a look on his face of what have i got into here so it's just a paycheck i think he

14:40

was just loving this whole thing i the vibe that i got is um kelly just sort of had this look in her

14:45

eyes that she just wanted to kill him like there wasn't like any there wasn't like a connection

14:50

between them or any sort of um indication that you know there was like a spark she just looked dead

14:56

in the eyes and just I don't know I just got that vibe that she just I don't know maybe she was the

15:01

smartest one here she does have a bit of a femme fatale vibe to her I guess like she's trying to

15:05

lure him in so she can like smack him over the head with a hammer or some shit like that oh she's

15:09

like the black widow yeah yeah she's gonna eat him certainly trying to put herself in like a position

15:14

of power definitely that's going on in there but of course she was really young when she did that

15:18

coming to like a femme fatale position when you're 17 it's not always the easiest no who hasn't been

15:24

there really you might think you're all that so my next question towards Anna is um did everyone

15:31

in like in the early 2000s in Brazil like did all teens dress as they came out of Cisco music videos

15:39

uh not everyone but I believe we all kind of aspired to nice I mean there were different groups

15:47

of people you know but there was something very like naughty's uh look about it and that kind of

15:53

like American school kind of look.

15:55

It was very in because Think About It,

15:57

Bring It On was just coming out

15:59

roughly around that time.

16:00

Mean Girls came out in 2005,

16:02

but before that you had all of the

16:04

American Pie ones

16:06

and you had just so much of that

16:08

and you just kind of like aspired

16:10

to that kind of look of a mix

16:12

between maybe Britney Spears and Blink-182.

16:14

Wow, this is a part of culture

16:17

that completely got missed in Bulgaria.

16:21

It's a little bad, obviously,

16:22

But yeah, I would have never gotten the reference for Bring It On specifically.

16:27

Well, I personally think Bring It On is a fantastic film.

16:32

Oh, I'm sure you do.

16:49

Dancers, yes, dancers.

16:52

they happened as well i guess well just apparently like those dancers that was like the first time

16:57

they casted dancers for for kelly key and the loads of them are still working with her and they they

17:02

formed like uh that was her very first video clip so they started working there and they should they

17:07

still working together apparently loads of them um so she's just like in the reaction video that

17:12

nelly was talking about she's like pointing then oh yeah this person oh my god he was so young oh

17:17

you're still working together now blah blah blah um but yeah apparently they were not very well

17:24

paid for that video but because of their commitment they took them on tour and then they were like all

17:30

bonuses and all of those things so like as like okay thank you for your investment of your time

17:35

and then they formed this this bond with them which is it sounds quite nice uh and for the start of it

17:40

for like a start of a career but the dancing seems fine i don't know much about that although i did

17:45

notice during some of the dance moves, the actual frame of the video moves, which I thought

17:49

was kind of cool.

17:50

Oh, I heard that.

17:51

It's very staggering, isn't it?

17:53

I just find it really jarring.

17:54

Like the way it kind of like zooms in and out and in and out in the rhythm of the music.

17:58

And even if it doesn't matter if they're good dancers or not, because you can't quite tell

18:03

if they're making mistakes or not.

18:04

So the auto-tuning of dancing.

18:06

Put in the notes here, Nellie, David's thoughts on auto-tuning.

18:09

Yes.

18:10

Generally, I think it's basically a cancer.

18:12

Nice.

18:13

It's not actually too bad in this one, to be honest.

18:16

It sounds like it.

18:16

I don't know if it's just the way she sings,

18:18

that it sounds that way,

18:20

or is it just actually auto-tuned as fuck?

18:22

I'd have to listen to it again,

18:23

but I think it does sound like there's been a little bit used,

18:25

but it's not done the kind of, you know,

18:27

the thing that's all arranged just now

18:28

of just having overpowering auto-tune over everything.

18:31

Yeah, no, her newest thing is ridiculously auto-tuned.

18:35

She just put out a new video clip actually this week,

18:37

and oh my God, it's a whole new world of auto-tuning.

18:41

in Baba you can see she's almost trying to do that husky voice a bit like a Britney kind of thing

18:50

yeah so she was going for that kind of vibe but yeah now she's just like nah

18:55

altitude it's it's a tool for correcting small mistakes and it's become a stylistic thing

19:00

which you can argue either way is good or bad but personally not a fan I feel that if you're

19:04

gonna have it as a main feature then I can only kind of excuse Cher for that because she started

19:11

whole thing she's she's she's allowed to do she's fighting to use auto tuner as a main feature in

19:15

my head anyway sure i can do what the fuck she likes should we talk about the money shot

19:22

yeah when you when you called our literal money shot on the notes i was like oh god paging don't

19:27

you're afraid it is it literally is like there's a zoom like i think you mentioned that it's a

19:34

you know it's like it's literally like zooming in like the lens is that a bit of filmic sexual

19:39

innuendo or am I giving the filmmakers far too much credit here no it's absolutely like innuendo

19:43

as fuck you're saying when the camera zooms into her and you can see the zoom of the lens is growing

19:49

yeah yeah yeah yeah I think that's my favorite part of the whole video clip

19:55

it's like peter gabriel all over again oh yeah you haven't heard that yeah yeah but you'll

19:59

understand that when it comes out in like two years time honestly like the last four episodes

20:04

we've had just basically about sex because yeah when it comes down to it all music is about sex

20:10

all music is either about sex or drugs no exceptions

20:26

okay neil talk about that that one shot please yeah that that that all makes no sense no sense

20:32

whatsoever. Technically it wouldn't work.

20:34

None of the photos would turn out. It felt like he was

20:36

just using it as the

20:39

he didn't have binoculars

20:40

so he just whipped out his camera

20:42

and then started zooming in

20:44

to her when she's across the way.

20:46

Plus I find it's a bit of a conflict of interest

20:48

if she's her neighbour.

20:50

Or she's his neighbour.

20:52

I did kind of find it a bit hilarious when

20:55

I think the idea with him

20:56

he's trying to do it on the fly

20:58

you know look really sneaky you know

21:00

and it felt like he was talking to someone else on the phone but am i right thinking he's talking

21:05

to her on the phone yeah i only only noticed the hands-free headset or earphone or whatever

21:10

you're like after the third time and i was like wait a minute yeah i was i was the same the first

21:15

the first couple of times watching this i was thinking who's he talking to on the phone he's

21:19

she's also talking to someone on the phone they can't be talking to each other because

21:23

he keeps on kind of looking like you know through the camera then you know out through the camera and

21:27

it felt like you know someone who's just trying to get

21:30

a you know like a peek without being caught

21:32

but I think it's he's talking to

21:34

Kelly and she's sort of

21:36

she's grooming him

21:38

she's

21:39

yeah

21:40

she's definitely she calls him the whole thing

21:44

she calls him from her

21:46

hands-free headset so she can

21:48

keep caressing herself

21:50

while dancing for him because she wants

21:52

to show off she's just like look at this

21:54

just look though you can't touch this

21:56

but look look and drool

21:59

look and drool at me

22:01

yes that's the whole point

22:02

of thing is she wants him

22:04

to stare at her I really think

22:06

they should have went to fall out and had

22:08

some drooling in the video

22:11

I think I would have had it too

22:13

if you pay attention

22:14

to the close shots of

22:17

her mouth when she's singing

22:19

baby you can see

22:21

there's like strands of drool

22:23

there really so the drool is

22:24

present is it yeah oh my god see that actually helps when someone's seen the video so many times

22:30

it actually knows it by heart which i refuse to just the third watch because it's such a

22:35

video yeah well this kind of fits in with uh anna sent us over the translation of the lyrics i'll

22:41

just read them out i might cut this out because it'll probably be embarrassing but i'll try uh

22:45

you didn't believe you didn't even look at me said i was too young for you but now i've grown up you

22:49

want to date me you didn't believe you didn't even notice said i was too young for you but now i've

22:54

grown up you want to date me i won't believe this false love who just wants to evade me and

22:59

fool evade me and fool me this is deceiving and not to say i'm bad i'll let you look at me just

23:04

look just look drool drool baby look at what you missed drool the child grew up well done to you

23:13

now i'm more me this is for you to learn never to snub me again baby okay i'm done

23:24

this is priceless

23:26

I love you reading this

23:27

this has just made us

23:29

that should be on your

23:31

tombstone

23:35

please put this in the cut

23:37

it just makes me too happy

23:40

let me get this straight

23:42

is she mad at him because

23:44

he didn't find her attractive when she was a kid

23:46

that's the vibe I was getting from the lyrics

23:48

that's what you get from the lyrics

23:49

that she was like as a child or like as an underaged she was like oh yeah come to me come to me and

23:57

then he was like no no no you're too young you're too young and now that she's grown up and he's into

24:02

her she's like no look but can't touch drew um it actually makes me very angry i'm sorry just the

24:12

whole existence of this song makes me so fucking angry i think that the whole gist of it was more to

24:18

do it like um her ex latino treating her as a child and not respecting her and snubbing her

24:25

she was a child she was literally a child well but yeah she was a child yeah but well he treated

24:30

her as a child but not enough of a child because they were in a relationship so he she was in an

24:36

adult relationship but being treated as a child and i think that that was the problem for her was

24:42

she not like 14 yep well yeah they moved in they moved in together when she was 16 but they

24:48

started when she was 14 like 13 14 and they had a child together you know before they turned before

24:54

she turned 18 yeah they had a child together when she was 17 oh geez it's a bit awkward doesn't it

25:00

yeah yeah there there is there is a good side uh well hear me out here uh there's a good side that

25:07

anna was talking about earlier where she knew that um kelly key has grown up she has part of an

25:11

organization which is kind of fighting that kind of thing so that's a silver lining i guess of the

25:15

backstory and she also did a campaign advert for um a condom for the carnival and i think it was

25:24

2003 2000 yeah 2003 where uh she says that uh sex without a condom only drew baby only drew

25:36

she was always on brand you can look you can just look and drill you can't touch me and there was

25:42

like a whole massive campaign for using condoms because if you are not wearing a condom you should

25:47

just like look and drool instead uh which uh i thought it was hilarious uh but yes you should

25:54

then use her her history like to to kind of uh as a stepping stones which is which is a good thing

25:59

because it's a fucked up history uh do you have any snails or trucking oh no just like her transition

26:04

between the shopping mall and then the school and then like the way suddenly everything goes dark and

26:09

It's just the two of them and she's seducing him.

26:12

And then suddenly she's like giving him a call and like teasing him.

26:16

And I just find the way that transitions between one segment to the other just so blatantly obvious.

26:21

And it's just so funny.

26:22

I just can't get over it.

26:24

When you say that you like it, do you mean in terms of it's so bad, it's good?

26:28

Or do you actually mean that you like it, like it?

26:31

I feel that this kind of things get tangled up in my head, Nelly.

26:35

You know, I have a thing for the delightfully bad.

26:38

Yes, that is true. This is why I'm just trying to figure out whether, like, where is this line on which side?

26:43

I don't know which one it is. I think it's just so bad. It's good.

26:48

Because, you know, at the time, maybe it was good.

26:50

But nowadays, it's just like, oh, my God, what the hell is going on here?

26:53

I just love it.

27:08

review zen i guess first i want to say i'm sorry to both you guys and as well as to our five

27:14

listeners who might be uh who might go out and seek this uh video it is the literal worst for me

27:20

and not in a dream kind of way it is bad and the background is disgusting and it raises so many

27:27

questions that i'm in no way equipped to discuss today and i just really hated the whole experience

27:32

of the video uh the background story the camera work was bad the ear grinding music uh and i know

27:39

sometimes when we talk we kind of try to suggest some some things that might improve the video but

27:45

in this case i don't think there's anything that could have saved it to be honest and i i from my

27:50

point of view it just needs to be set on fire thrown in the bin and just start again there's

27:54

literally nothing redeemable for me in the video and i know it's kind of like it's obviously early

28:00

naughty is bad pop music video but it's just uh tell us how you really feel yep next please so

28:08

when i first seen the 10 second long title card that seemed to use comic sans i knew that was in

28:13

for something uh something bad i knew it was going to be trouble i think the naughty's charms everywhere

28:17

but this video is a shit show there's an overuse of vignette and reverse footage unnecessary jump

28:22

cuts some of which last for five frames i actually counted them so if you blink you'll miss it but to

28:28

be honest that'll be no bad thing uh to me kelly kelly kelly feels like she's wanting to murder her

28:33

teacher um she knows what she wants he knows what she wants and he knows what she wants blood it looks

28:38

like if each other is obvious but he clearly can't help himself technically the video isn't great the

28:42

use of odd angles did scream early 2000s but the constant close-ups of kelly's face didn't provide

28:48

enough variety i personally got very bored quickly looking at kelly's dead sold his eyes

28:52

and this wasn't helped by the mediocre choreography brought uh the video to disappointment which could

28:58

for the end of the video,

29:00

which could be seen

29:00

for the end of the video,

29:01

which ended up,

29:02

what am I trying to say here?

29:03

Look, this video had no point.

29:05

It was a disappointment.

29:06

An absolutely mediocre disappointment.

29:09

And the music to me

29:09

isn't even catchy.

29:10

It's not in my head right now,

29:12

but that's really probably

29:13

because I'm too busy

29:14

critiquing the other stuff.

29:15

But yeah, not good.

29:17

It definitely reminds me

29:19

of the kind of,

29:20

honestly, this isn't porn films.

29:21

It used to be on Channel 5

29:23

late at night,

29:24

back in the 90s and 90s.

29:25

Obviously, that's only a reference

29:26

that UK people get about figured out.

29:29

the video itself

29:30

it's kind of

29:31

it's your standard

29:32

Britney Spears

29:33

sort of over-sexualized

29:34

pop star bullshit

29:35

which is fine

29:36

if you ignore the backstory

29:37

anyway

29:37

and that's all I have to say

29:38

about the video

29:39

the song

29:39

I do think the song is catchy though

29:41

and it's going to be stuck

29:41

in my head for days

29:42

so there's that

29:43

rather you than me

29:44

best and worst parts

29:46

I'm past and best parts

29:47

I genuinely have nothing

29:48

that I like

29:49

worst

29:51

would be

29:52

probably be

29:52

the male actor

29:54

the guy

29:55

Marcelo Novires

29:56

I don't know him as an actor

29:58

how he's like IRL acting,

30:00

but he just,

30:01

he's so creepy that it's,

30:03

yeah, no thanks.

30:04

Actually, no,

30:05

the whole video is horrible.

30:06

I hate all of it.

30:08

Would he be equivalent

30:09

to Eamon Holmes in the UK?

30:11

Eamon Holmes?

30:13

Yeah.

30:13

He's like a TV presenter.

30:16

Okay.

30:16

I think he'd be more like

30:18

equivalent to like

30:18

an EastEnders actor, I think.

30:20

Like a Phil Mitchell.

30:21

Yeah.

30:23

My favourite part is

30:24

awkwardly sped up

30:25

dancing on the stairs

30:26

because I just approve

30:27

of people bursting into dance at random i think life would be a lot better if we all did that

30:31

and the worst part is once again the teacher because he's he's he's only got one setting

30:36

acting wise he just has a constant look of somewhere between mildly aroused and why the

30:41

did my agent get me this job and that's him the whole way through the video so that's more fun

30:47

yeah i think my favorite part now it's funny because i knew the model of this camera that he

30:50

was using um so yeah it's a 35 mil point and shoot sumi style camera olympus is 3000 for those who

30:56

really want to know but i couldn't help to notice the pop-up flash was in use this combined shooting

31:01

an extremely low light and i can tell you as a fact as a professional photographer the photos

31:06

will look like utter shite most likely they come out as him in the reflection of the window like

31:11

perving that that's all the photos he's gonna have i i think his mind is occupied with other things

31:17

i think he's just wanting to take a picture of the sexy lady not thinking about what's going on

31:22

Maybe it's on auto flash.

31:23

You've really got to get your technical details on point when you're pervin.

31:28

That's what I've learned from this video.

31:30

Yeah, I think the worst part was the really disjointed jumpy editing.

31:35

Just to me felt like at times there was just like the video had frozen and it took a while to catch up.

31:41

I just thought it pretty disorientating.

31:43

Usually I don't mind, you know, jumpy editing, but this one just really took the biscuit.

31:47

Well, to me, this video has a foot of nostalgia of times gone by.

31:53

So I do have, I don't know if it's the advantage or disadvantage of having seen it when it came out.

31:59

So to me, my favorite part, keep in mind, I have a very weird way to relate whether it's good and bad when something is so bad that it's good.

32:09

So to me, the best part is by far the lens, the zoom lens coming in and the not at all subtle sexual innuendo going on in there.

32:21

That to me is fantastic.

32:23

And to me, I don't know if it's the best part or the worst part, but like the way she caresses things, the way she caresses things because she doesn't know what to do with her hands.

32:33

And I think that that's just hilarious.

32:35

So I think that might be, they're both the best and the worst parts to me.

32:39

In the case of this video clip, it's just like one big bundle.

32:43

I can't differentiate what's bad or good because it's just one ball of mess that to me makes me feel fuzzy because it's my teenage years.

32:53

Nostalgia is a powerful thing.

32:54

Oh, very powerful.

32:56

Even with a nowadays lens, I can completely appreciate how fucked up the whole thing is, but I can't look at it and listen to the song without feeling happy.

33:05

Yeah, I think it's a no from me.

33:07

It's a hell no from me.

33:09

It's a very obvious no.

33:10

Oh, I like the video.

33:12

I think it's brilliant.

33:13

It's a piece of its time.

33:15

That's why I keep showing to people.

33:17

That's why I showed it to you guys.

33:20

But I have a very weird vision of this kind of thing.

33:30

So what we do next week then?

33:32

Can we do a good song, please?

33:34

No, have you read the description of the podcast?

33:37

No, actually not.

33:38

I suppose you guys could do a good song with a bad video clip.

33:41

That's true, that's true.

33:42

Haraway Life, that's a tune.

33:44

Yeah, let's go for like crazy Europop.

33:47

Okay, join us next week where we're going to be watching Life by Haraway.

33:52

Bye.

33:53

Bye.

33:53

Bye-bye.

33:55

Bye.

33:55

Thank you for having me.

34:23

*music*